The Fool's Page

Went away again...

2005-09-21T12:06:00.000+03:00

Well, it's been a long time since my lst post.
It's time to update:
Kind of stopped working as a medic in field trips,
And started giving a push on my work at the Dunk Pub,
I went to Sinai with a good friend from the army, who moved
to germany a few months ago to settle down,
And now i'm working on a new appartment in Kiriat Ata,
It's an old house, which no one lived in for the last ten years,
so my friend and I are giving it a completly new paint job,
and more (there was a huge crack in the bath, from which you could
see the outside),
But the cool thing about the appartment is that it's free for us to live in for the next year.
That was the short version of my life in the last couple of months.
Next time i hope will be soon, and may even be interesting.

Nicholas D. Wolfwood

2005-08-06T22:50:00.000+03:00

Is one of the main characters in the superb anime series "Trigun".
He is an ace gunman, a priest, and carries a large gun disguised as a cross.

He uses revenge as a way of life, until he meets the main character of the series, Vash The Stampede, and understands, a moment before the end, why he was wrong all his life.
Watch the series, and understand why I find him the most interesting character in it.

Drunk

2005-07-30T12:22:00.000+03:00

Translation of something I wrote down last night in a pub:
When you close you eyes
The demons come running at you
Back and forth, forth and back
They run, attack, around you
You close your eyes for a moment
And the moment seems like eternity
You open your eyes
And everything's gone
Just like a bad dream
Just like a bad dream

Going on another trip

2005-07-27T13:01:00.000+03:00

Going on another too many days trip,
some much to write,
no will to.

so i won't for the time being.

Suck it in

2005-07-09T02:11:00.000+03:00

Spent the evening waiting to watch a movie (Constantine) with my girl,
Then my brother and a friend were supposed to come watch it with us.
I wanted to smoke some hash, but didn't, because my girl is in the army and didn't want to.
The friend went to sleep,
My brother stayed at the party he was at,
And some other friends we didn't want to watch the movie with came.
Eventually, my girl went to sleep, and i'm here writing this.

Did not watch any movie, did not use any kind of drug, did not listen to any music.
A bad friday, it is.

Balagan

2005-06-27T10:09:00.000+03:00

Please visit Balagan to understand why...

Late Night Blues

2005-06-24T02:55:00.000+03:00

Blues is based on "Blue Notes".
Every third, fifth, or seventh note is lowered by half a tone.
This lowered note is called a "Blue Note".
This is what makes us feel that certain down blues has.
It's not an exact explanation, but it is enough.
Just had a talk with a friend of my brother's, he's a good guy,
He's in the same place I was at the navy, but on a different ship.
Seems he got some of my notes blue.
It threw me back to that time, to the total feeling of depression.
Depression in it's older form, when you are being depressed by others.
I'm not depressed at the moment, but I have that blue feeling.
black in the lungs, your whole stomach is going around like a washing machine,
wet clothes inside whirling and shifting your balance all the time.

Mood for disaster. I'd bet that if it'd be daylight the skies would've been grayish red.

Why does it has to be that way?

2005-06-10T20:56:00.000+03:00

Initiated a conversation with my girl today.
Told her about the things that are bothering me.
Developed in to a fight.
I just want to be happy, and I feel that all that time I wanted her, and she didn't want me, I never asked for anything, because all I wanted was her.
now, that we're together for some time, I start telling her about things that I don't like,
and it seems to me like she can't handle my criticism.
I hate fighting with her, especially since she's in the army, and we don't get to see each other much anyway, but sometimes I simply say "the hell with it" to myself and decide that I have to resolve the issue.
it always becomes so dramatic, and sometimes, like now, I don't know what to do with myself.

Pairs

2005-06-09T21:25:00.000+03:00

And my latest discoveries:
- Started posting in pairs,
- Stopped using spel chek.
- Found out that teachers in Israel are corrupt people,
always getting stuff for themselves, doing things they
don't allow their pupils.
- Girls walk slower that boys, and will often complain and
scream when interacting with thorns and rocks.
- Boys can't stand that you do something they don't
understand and often comment about it, and ask
stupid questions.
- People like to buy stuff for the sake of buying,
and sometimes even if they don't really want it.
- Tour guides are arrogant people.

Music Fantastic!

2005-06-09T21:15:00.000+03:00

So much music affecting me lately.
bought a few CD's, copied a few mp3's from my brother, and more.
I know this is kind of boring, but this blog is for me and me alone.
Here is my playlist for the last couple of weeks.

King Crimson, Lizard - When you're feeling dark and gloomy.
King Crimson, Red - On the road, dark crazy distorted.
Gentle Giant, Aquiring the Taste - Cool evening jazzy rock.
Frank Zappa, Bongo Fury and One Size Fits All - When you're crazy.
Yes, Fragile - When you're harmonic and in touch with everything.
Pink Floyd, Meddle - Is there anything in the world that makes you feel cooler than it?
Beatles - Any given goddamn time.

Is there no good music made these days?

2005-06-02T20:37:00.000+03:00

A Drawing i made sitting by the western wall of the ancient temple in Jerusalem. Don't care much for religion. The funny thing is that I didn't finish it there for the first time, and by chance came back two days later and finished it.

(maybe) Here Again

2005-06-02T19:44:00.000+03:00

I'm not sure what made me stop posting.
I love it, and it is a kind of a therapy for me.
when I came back from my "miluyim" I knew that everything has to change.
I knew that I cannot carry on working five days a week in a pub that distorts my life.
I had a week full of doing absolutely nothing which helped me understand that doing nothing is the most horrible state a man could be in.
my family drove me crazy with housework, and after a confrontation I started doing everything, and even enjoyed it.
I found an amazing job.
going on trips and meeting good people, eating and sleeping in hotels, while getting (not too much) money for it.
I think this cleared my mind. When I'm hiking I don't think about anything, and (for the good and bad) I am not alone for a second. I can choose how much I want to interfere, and no matter what choice I make it is ok.
I got some new music. Good progressive rock is what I need.
only thing is that I'm not at home much.
even if I come back to bloggin' hard, it wouldn't be as frequent as before.
and still, feel strapped.

Lost myself

2005-06-02T19:37:00.000+03:00

First thing: thank you Adrian for awaking me from my slumber.
I have been lost for a while, working on changing my lifestyle, and many things.
a quick explanation of the things that happened to me:
I left Haifa because of miluyim.
miluyim was postponed to a month later.
did not come back to Haifa.
suspended my job at the pub.
started working as a medic and security guy escorting school and foreign expeditions.
went on a seven days expedition with some Australians.
went on a few more trips.
second miluyim was cancelled too.
went on some more trips.
worked in the pub a day or two for that whole time.
will add another post to explain.

Miluyim

2005-04-13T14:06:00.000+03:00

Is the word for ex-soldiers in Israel being called for service for a maximum of 21 days a year.
You can be summoned only after a year since you finished your service.
I've been called to service after one year and four days.
The army sure doesn't waste any time, which is a shame, since it wastes almost everything else. I have nine qualification points as a weapons control operator, seven qualification points as a medic, and still, I will be doing that time as an ordinary infantry soldier with my two lousy qualification points for that.
anyway, I will be going there on the 19 of April, which means I won't be able to post for some time.

A Stranger at Home

2005-04-11T12:46:00.000+03:00

Came back to the dunk pub after 3 days of not working.
I felt strange.
I felt like a stranger in my own home.
a pub is very dynamic, especially in the weekends, so many small insignificant things have changed, that only someone who knows the pub really good can notice.
being the foreman of the dunk, the place has many nuances of my personality.
it's organized the way I like it, plays my music, serves the drinks I support.
but in three short days, it can all change.
took me a few hours of moving stuff and yelling at my boss to get it bogeyman'ed again.
but still, is the pub's memory so short?

Happy Birthday

2005-04-11T12:35:00.000+03:00

To me.
Turned 23 last Friday. Funny how every time I simply can't remember how old I am.
my girlfriend's mom asked me how old I am, and I just blacked out.
no matter. Had an amazing birthday,
got really cool gifts and I haven't worked for three days.
we went to a Brazilian meat restaurant on Friday, that for some reason had a DJ playing Latin music.
he was the only thing that was not perfect on my birthday.
in fact, he was annoying.
just because you have a microphone, and you are bored, are you subject to talk without pause and interrupt people who are trying to enjoy their meal?
why are you playing that music, if your blabbing doesn't let me hear it?
anyway, it didn't ruin anything like it looks.
the evening was great...
proportion is good. (a new thing in my personality)

Infinite Cat Project

2005-04-06T16:22:00.000+03:00

I Usually won't link to other websites, But this too bizarre and cool
not to.
A Cat looking at a monitor. In the monitor there is a picture of another cat watching a third cat on his own monitor. So stupid. So pointless. So GOOD!
Hurrah to Mike Stanfill for his boredom and great idea.
there are currently pictures of 856 (!) cats looking at eachother.
http://www.infinitecat.com/infinite/cat1.html

Five Years

2005-04-01T11:46:00.000+03:00

Today is the estimated 5 year anniversary to my girl and me meeting.
I thought we estimated it as the fourth of April, so the it won't be in April fool's day.
come to think of it,
this is supposed to be my day, being the fool, and having been born in April.
no matter, waking up by a beautiful girl, thinking about all we've been through,
5 years are almost a quarter of my life.
makes me feel good.

Some kind of a techincal error

2005-04-01T11:44:00.000+03:00

Resolted in me not posting for a couple of days.
I'm back, now.

Jump into the fire

2005-03-26T15:45:00.000+02:00

Dealing with fears:
A man is afraid of spiders.
What will he do to overcome this fear of his?
Walk in to a whole cavern. this will help him in the future.
A woman is afraid of heights.
She will jump out of an airplane.
Someone hates alcohol.
He will have a shot of the nastiest drink in the pub.
A boy and a girl are afraid of eachother.
They will leap in bed and have sex.
Is that what random sex is?

A new hope

2005-03-25T11:26:00.000+02:00

One of the neighbours thinks she saw my Mamush, my cat.
Could she still be amongst the living?
Last night I smoked a cigarette before I went to sleep,
Thinking that it may be time to persume her dead.
Is it any good to give us that hope that she's still alive?
I really miss that cat, but no decadent cat like that one can survive in the outdoors for eight days.

Cray-Z

2005-03-24T15:58:00.000+02:00

Drove all the way to the Galilee last night after work,
Only to take an aquarium with two pond-turtules to my house.
Picking a large glass aquarium with two turtles some rocks and water at 5:00am is no fun at all.

Mamush, the eternal princess of clumsiness

2005-03-23T12:37:00.000+02:00

In "Leil Haseder" 2004. Please come back...

Overhearing a friend

2005-03-23T12:22:00.000+02:00

A good friend visited me in the pub last night.
this certain friend is the one who got me starting blogging.
after we talked for a while (interrupted by other customers all the time)
some friends of his came, and they moved to another table.
for reasons that are hidden within the depths of my personality
I could not join the conversation, but I had a real good time overhearing it.
I don't even know why I enjoyed it so, but as all the other customers left,
I poured myself some Tullamore Dew whiskey, smoked and listened for a long while.
it's been two double whiskeys until I freed myself from it.
Yep. Being passive is really good sometimes.

A dead cat.

2005-03-23T12:10:00.000+02:00

A dead cat lying on the road welcomed my presence last night when I came home.
it was white and gray, and had some blood splattered by it.
I drove a colleague home, so I had to drive by it 3 times.
in time many cars will run it over, and it will blend into the road,
leaving only some remains of fur as it's tombstone.
a part of someone's life, rotting on the road.
a cat that was being fed by someone,
that was thrown to the floor when it climbed on the table.
my cat's gone too.
a dog chased her to the woods almost a week ago.
my whole family looked for her until yesterday, when they decided to quit it.
It was too much for my younger brother.
I'm tempted to write how great she is, but I'm not sure if she's still "is".
it will be a couple of days until I can write a lament.